I love the start of a New Year – a clean slate to embark upon fresh goals with an eager spirit.  It is especially meaningful to Brad and I given an annual reminder that life is unbelievably precious.  Tomorrow marks Brad’s 3rd anniversary to being diagnosed with LB.   In some ways it is easy to hate the 6th of January – but in every other way we are able to cherish it (he calls it his birthday).  We can wake up with gratitude, hope and love – tomorrow is exciting.  Brad feels great and is constantly improving!  He is happy, full of love, and jam-packed with a heart that could lift a lunch crowd at Dairy King.  Life is good…and the best part is — it only gets better!

I have been nagging Brad (hard to believe) about his New Year’s resolutions…or just looking for ideas for myself.  In planning for 2012 I am excited to be present (we used to have practice jerseys for soccer that said “wherever you are – be there”) – I hope to make that happen.  But in a nutshell I hope I can forward along the gratitude and happiness that Brad passes along everyday.  We are blessed to be “present” and tomorrow will be another year that reminds us how awesome this ride is…and as a good friend always says “YOU GET ONE TRIP”.

We continue to thank each and every one of you for your continued love and support.  May 2012 be everything you dreamed of!

Brad and I took the trip to Denver yesterday for the quarterly check up.  The scan was pretty status quo – which is a good thing… just staying the course in land of ’no news is good news’.  Essentially, the pictures looked pretty similar to the ones from August.

Originally we had hoped to taper Brad off the steroids in the past few months, but were unable to do this as he is not producing steroids naturally right now.  As I understand it, everyone produces steroids via their adrenal gland, but since Brad has been on the drugs for so long he is not making his own.  So, we are mixing up the meds and changing brands to something that will hopefully be easier to ween off of.  Hopefully in a few short months, we will be reducing the Avastin and stepping closer to the goal of getting off the meds.  For now, we stay the course…and that ain’t all bad!

We have been working through some sideways twists lately as Brad is weighing in at 152 lbs. (which puts him as a serious competitor in the featherweight class at Vanatta Outfitters).  We have been tracking the weight-loss and reviewing blood work to try and zero in on what specifically was going on.  Turns out Brad’s thyroid is having its very own Occupy Brad and refuses to turn off (or go away).  This is being caused by an autoimmune disease know as Graves disease.

Graves Disease is one of the most common of all thyroid problems in which the thyroid gland produces excessive hormones. Once the disorder is diagnosed, it is easy to treat and in some cases it can go into remission or disappear completely after several months or years. Although the symptoms can cause discomfort, Graves’ disease generally has no long-term adverse health consequences – the main side effect we have noticed has been the weight loss, but it hard to track in the mix of everything else.  We are going to meet with a specialist soon in Denver, and should know more in the upcoming weeks.  I am optimistic some holiday food and exercise will get Brad back to fighting weight in no time.

Thanks for your continued love and support.  We hope you enjoy a great Thanksgiving with family and friends!

It is hard to believe that we are only a few days away from November – summer flew by at a surreal pace.  Brad is wrapping up another hunting season with Vanatta Outfitters, we have winterized the house, and kicked off our winter driving season with the first white-knuckle trip home from Denver (in typical Cusenbary fashion).

I think Brad is approaching winter with more optimism this year, as he has received a new getaway rig for him and his horse Emily.  A couple great friends, Pam and Steve Williams, were kind enough to think of Brad while they were visiting family in Pueblo, and found this great horse trailer – he now has it polished up and parked in the 146 driveway!  He is on cloud nine about the adventure mobile taking full-shape next summer…and overwhelmed by the incredible generosity of friends.

Since the last scan Brad has been tapering off his steroids in an effort to completely come off all the meds and get another step closer to normal.  After being on steroids for over 2+ years to help reduce the swelling around LB, his body is not producing steroids on its own right now.  We tested his cortisol level and found it to be very low, so the side-effects of fatigue, nausea, etc have set in.  It is a small set-back that is hopefully going to be corrected by incorporating a new brand of steroid that will get his levels back up and provide for an easier taper over the next few months.  It will take a month or so to kick in, but I am keeping my fingers crossed that he will be feeling better soon.  Lord knows Brad is never slow to do anything!

Last week we spent a couple days in Denver working with a few rehab specialists for Brad’s leg and arm.  He got his quarterly Botox injection – feel free to compliment his smooth skin.  The botox has been great at releasing the tone/tension in his hand and leg.  Plus, we spent some time touching up his Bioness tools to get him  walking strong and giving knuckles with his right hand.

In two weeks we head back to Denver for an MRI.  As always the gut has started to twist, but I know in my heart we will continue to get good news…given a few minor hiccups along the way.  I will be sure to post the details as soon as I am able.

Thanks for your continued support…Keep the positive thoughts and prayers flying – we appreciate it.

The past six weeks have flown by – hosting the 7th Annual Tour de Steamboat with 600+ bike riders, a two week speech program in Denver, family visits, Cheyenne Frontier Days, participating in the Ride 4 Yellow, getting GREAT news on the latest MRI, watching the world’s best road bikers compete in the USA Pro Cycling Challenge, celebrating Brad ‘s 41st birthday on top of Rabbit Ears Pass, a beautiful San Diego wedding with some amazing girlfriends…and now it is hunting season.

The MRI took place on August 24th and reiterated the fact that the treatment effect and swelling had pretty much dissipated.  An MRI sometimes includes what is called a Profusion Scan that shows the blood flow around the tumor area.  A tumor needs a significant amount of blood to create the nasty rapidly reproducing cancer cells (evil do’ers)- so we were PSYCHED to see little to no blood flow in the area.  The tumor is looking smaller and as the doc said – this looks good…really good.  You can only imagine our smiles when we drove home to kick off Brad’s birthday celebration – which included the world’s best cyclists in our home town for a Colorado race!

Summer has arrived in Steamboat and the summer schedule is in full swing!  We have put the blog on the back burner somewhat to focus our energy on our dream (returning to normal). But after a few emails and nudges I am going to get back in the habit…or nudge Brad to do it . The best part is I think he will be psyched to share these posts. Brad is working, exercising, healing…and smiling.

The Tour de Steamboat is this weekend, so we are preparing for the 7th annual Sunshine Kids fundraiser – 250 attendees at a Benefit dinner, 600+ bike riders, and a BBQ ought to provide a fun and festive weekend!  Needless to say, Brad is full steam ahead in prepping for the ride, working away and finding time to spend with his other lady…Emily…his horse.

He is working tirelessly at rehabilitating his body and mind.  It is not happening over night, but it is indeed happening and getting better every day. He finds improvement everywhere: the ability to point his right toe forward in stride, count a hand of dominoes on game night, saddle a horse, or walk a meadow with a friend. Seriously it is fun, frustrating, challenging, exhausting and exhilarating.  Every day we can find something new that is moving in the right direction.  And without a doubt there is an abundance of patience that he puts forth every day that majority of mankind cannot even begin  to fathom.  When we discuss rehab we have done our best to boil it down to the old adage: How do you eat an elephant…one bite at a time.   We know this will take a lot of time and hard work – but we are happy to say we have the time.

Tomorrow we are heading to Denver to meet with a new speech pathologist – phase one in eating an elephant is figuring out the speech.  The program she is proposing has never been done on a brain tumor case, so we are excited to dive into something innovative with both feet and find some solutions.  The theory on this particular treatment is rather intensive and will take two weeks for Brad to spend in Denver with 3-4 hours per day.  It will not be easy, but I think the two of us barely know how to spell the word anymore.

On top of it all – today we are celebrating our 4th wedding anniversary.  So here is to celebrating love, life and laughter ~ and to the husband that can defy all odds and make the universe smile.   We are truly blessed to have one another.

Happy Bastille Day!

Spring is finally itching its way into the Yampa Valley – and this is truly a welcomed change of season.  Brad is on the move and we are ready for the snow to melt so he can take to the streets without the ice.  The Bioness is helping Brad walk with more ease and comfort than he has felt in over a year.  I am on the countdown to a dance lesson from my favorite two-stepper!  For those wondering how the Bioness works, it is a cuff that goes around Brad’s right calf muscle (just below his knee).  It has a sensor under his heal that signals the cuff to fire the muscles in his leg to lift his foot up when he is walking.

We have started the 30 day trial of the Bioness!  This is the device that fits around Brad’s calf muscle and helps fire muscles based on a sensor in his shoe.  You can check out a video at www.bioness.com – he has the L300 for foot drop.  It is a breath of fresh air to see a new twist in the recovery plan.  Brad is busy figuring out his new gadget and it is exciting to see him walking stronger…plus it has brought a pretty cute twinkle to his eyes that he (one day in) feels more stable…it is easy to dream of what can happen in 6 months with the help of this device.

We are eagerly awaiting a reply from Untied Healthcare regarding the appeal process – they said it was unproven but we are fighting that and fingers crossed will have an approval letter next week!  Thanks to Leigh Ann and Jay, we were able to submit a video to them re-enforcing the case.  Several phones calls later…we are back in the waiting game but with good amounts of optimism.

The past few months have been a good return to ‘normal’…closer for us anyways.  The weather has been keeping us on our toes with -40 degree temps, 300″ of snow and tricky walking conditions, but the last two days of sunshine were miraculous for us both!  The great news is that Brad is feeling good.  He continues to work full-time for Vanatta Outfitters and has already started planning the 2011 Tour de Steamboat (you ALL should sign up today at www.tourdesteamboat.com).  He is also managing a full-time physical therapy schedule, which includes treatments for his hand and leg…and helping work out the kinks that develop as side effects to his issues (hip and back pain mostly).  He is making progress, and we are optimistic to see where it can go with the addition of the Bioness.

I think the best treatment of all has been Miss Emily, Brad’s horse.  He takes care of her every day at the Sidney Peak barn, and rides around 2 times per week.  It is a very special relationship for them both, and one that makes Brad light up.  She takes good care of him too by being incredibly in tune with his physical conditions.  We could not be more grateful to have her in our lives this year!

We are heading back to Denver this month for another MRI, doctor appointments, PT visit, OT visit, and blood work.  He is back on the Avastin so we are keeping a good watch on things.  He went back on the Avastin in January to help mitigate some swelling from the treatments – nothing indicative of tumor activity so that is GREAT!

I know I have said it before…and will probably say it 10,000 more times – Brad has been an all-star through this.  His attitude is strong…even when he gets frustrated – it is quick and usually ends with him laughing at himself.  It is a long road, but to see the progress he is making…well there is simply put, no better Valentine’s gift out there.

Hope you are all doing well!

What I trying to say is this – It’s been 2 years today since I had my first brain surgery.  I told everyone I was too stubborn to let it get the better of me.  Rednecks don’t go away easy – just ask Laura!  (thank God for my smoking hot wife)

I couldn’t have survived these 2 years without everbody’s support.  Friends and Family thank you!

Lots of Love – Brad

I wrote this post just before the New Year and realized it never published.  Material is slightly dated but it has some good content so why not catch up now…

Dear 2010,

You were quite a ride for the Cusenbary household…and I do not mean to be rude, but you will not be missed.  Don’t get me wrong – there were plenty of highlights…but we are REALLY looking forward to a NEW YEAR, fresh start, new beginning…you get the point.

As I mentioned there were plenty of highlights in 2010:

• Introducing Lance Armstrong at the Ride 4 Yellow event
• Hunting mountain lions hunt with great friends at WMR and hogs in Texas
• A sell-out year for the Tour de Steamboat
• The addition of a new family member, Miss Emily (Brad’s mistress – a.k.a. horse)
• A new job for Laura at Wells Fargo Investments
• A trip to the beach with family
• Olympic victories for Steamboat athletes

And many more festivities that I am spacing…

But there were also some challenges:

• 2 hospital stays
• Crappy chemo treatments
• 1 brain surgery
• A speech impairment
• An ACL surgery for our dog Dugan

I will say that the challenges were (and continue to be) tackled one day at a time.  It would be easy to get overwhelmed by our list of to-do’s for Brad’s recovery.  But the saying ‘You know how to eat an elephant…one bite at a time’ is a montra for us.

In this cliche time of year, where we all look back and reflect on what took place, and set our goals for the upcoming year, I looked further back than 365 days.  I remembered a Derby party where I had my first crush on a Texan.  I thought of a camp trip with friends where my boyfriend amazed me with his thoughtfulness and consistent care for others.  And then I thought of a wedding – where I was the luckiest girl in the world.  I did make my way to 2010  and realized Brad, who is always looking out for those around him; also happens to be the strongest man on the planet.  Brad’s courage each and every day coupled with his unwavering spirit are great things to note as we plan 2011 resolutions.

He is happy, grateful and determined to get back on skis, ride his bike, and be himself again.  Here’s to 2011 – may it be filled with health, happiness and an abundance of laughter.

I took some time to look back over the blogs from the past year.  Our blog before Thanksgiving last year talked about hiking Emerald Mountain together at lunch, discussions of another surgery, and how chemo was working.  It is amazing to think of the ground Brad has covered in one year’s time.  He is one STRONG S.O.B…in spirit, determination and heart.

Brad’s right side is slowly but surely coming back.  He continues to ride the trainer bike, attend physical therapy three time a week, and work around the nuances of recovery that can include speech, balance, and the opening of a maple syrup bottle.  Plus he added another component to rehab and is back in the saddle – literally.  Miss Emily joined the family a couple weeks ago – she is an amazing quarter horse that takes good care of him…not a mistress in case that is what you were thinking.   It is good to see him have the strength to saddle her all on his own, walk on the uneven dirt with her before mounting up for a ride, and smile from ear to ear as he trots around the arena.  Plus, we are working on getting our insurance company to approve a new device for his leg call Bioness.  It is a really cool technology that would help get his muscles back to firing again.  United Healthcare does not know the wrath that will come their way if they do not rethink their current decision!  You can actually check out videos of the Bioness here.

Last week threw us a small curve ball on the road to recovery – Brad ended up back in Denver with headaches and slowed speech from more brain swelling.  They think it is another batch of treatment effect and not tumor progression.  It is pretty scary (and terribly frustrating) to think of anything that could derail his progress, but he was put back on the steroids and feels 100% better.  As you can imagine we both were pretty nervous to be back in the position of cancer patient and caretaker.  Looking back does make us grateful for everything we have – but there is NO interest is revisiting any of those places.

We are flying to Florida tomorrow to be with my 93 year-old grandfather and family for Thanksgiving, and delighted to taking an actual vacation! It is overwhelming to think how much we have to be thankful for this holiday season.  Not a day goes by that we do not sit down and talk about a new revelation of healing, a friend or family member that made our day brighter, or simply how lucky we are to have each other.  I wish I could elaborate on the gratitude we feel for each day…but that would make me sound too cheesey…and you know I can’t have that.

We hope you have a great Thanksgiving.  We will be toasting you in the sunny south – BRING ON THE BEACH!